I can’t think of an opening sentence. It would usually be something along the lines of “Recently, I…” or, perhaps, “Seeing that…”. I have developed some sort of format for opening sentences but I don’t want to follow that because it gets a bit samey. There’s no reason for this review. I was just a bit bored. This is a great album. If you’re anything like I hope you are, dear reader, then you would have already heard it. If you haven’t, do! I’m going to start now.

The opening song you have definitely heard, no exception. Seven Nation Army is a staple of rock music and probably one of the most commerically successful songs of the last decade. This is most likely due to the simple, accessible beats, not demanding any mental involvement. However, there is a second layer to it, the lyrics. The way they are sung is sort of haunting and the meanings of them are cryptic, producing gothic imagery. The video is iconic, from the strobes to the skeletons. The repeated bassline is so catchy and the guitar work is masterful.

Skeletons.

Skeletons.

My personal favourite, guitar-wise, Black Math has a non-stop riff and beat that doesn’t cease until the 3:04 song is over. The guitar, like on most of their songs, is rough and fast paced. The use of symbals is ridiculously heavy and the energy of the song is undenyable.

Slowing the pace down, There’s No Home For You Here has many strengths. However, my favourite of them is the lyrics and way they’re sung. The lyrics themselves are bitter, their venom elevated by Jack White’s aggressive style of delivery. This is also a high point of Meg White’s basic, simple, mind-numbingly dull drumming as there is a slight bit of variation.

The Hardest Button To Button is probably the most unaccessible of all of the songs on the album, yet they released it as a single. This is my opinion because of the offbeat tones and melancholic base. The short bursts of guitar and surreal lyrics further prove this theory.

When you think you’re ready to rest, Hypnotise wakes you up again by, metaphorically, pouring hydrochloric acid into your eyes and then shouting at you. There is no opening, middle and end. There is only rock. One of the shortest songs on the album, it’s the perfect soundtrack to a quick fight or training montage, if you’re so inclined.

After that energy blast to your system, the pace is slowed right down but the volume is turned right up. The Air Near My Fingers has a weird sound going right through it. It sounds like either a guitar or keyboard but my ears aren’t trained enough to determine what it is. I like it though. The repeated line “I’m getting nervous when she comes around” is sung eerily, making you get nervous when she comes around, whatever that means.

Following that, Girl, You Have No Faith In Medicine is probably the greatest diagnosis from the coolest doctor. With super cool guitar solos, the song does a similar job to Hypnotise getting you pumped up whether you like it or not.

To conclude, this is probably my favourite alternative album and a masterpiece of rock culture.

93/100

Lots of hugs, kisses and lacerations

Uncle Milo.

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