SIDE NOTE: This review is actually the reason sub-reviews exist. While I was playing the game (on an emulator, obviously!), my PC decided to crash mid-way through playing. Ok, fine, I guess I’ll carry on from my last save. NOPE! Save corrupted. Great. I don’t think I know enough to make a full review, and I don’t have the patience to play it all again. So, a mini-review!
Anyway, onto the review. Probably the most famous part of Zelda: WoG is the cutscenes. They are, special. The animation is some of the worst I’ve ever seen. They have very few frames and the actual quality of the picture is plain bad. But, bad cutscenes are forgivable, as long as the gameplay is good. Well…
There are 3 buttons on the CDi controller. A is used for attacking, B is used to use items, or pause. Yes, OR. Only when your crouching does it pause, AND BUTTON C ISN’T USED AT ALL! The platforming is awkward. Not only is the D-pad awful, the way the game is designed in such a way that you can’t tell where you can or cannot stand. It’s hard to tell without playing it, but the screenshot should give you some idea of what I mean.
Also, most of the enemies die in one hit. MOST. The only exceptions are some bosses. That’s right. SOME. They don’t even contribute to the story, AT ALL. They are just distractions from the rest of the game. The worst offender is Ganon himself. Not only is he extremely laughable, he also immediately dies as soon as you throw the Wand of Gamelon at him. It’s not even an epic build up, where you have to wait for the right moment to throw it. You just walk up to him, and throw it. GAME OVER.
This game is probably the WORST game I have ever played. It’s controls are awkward, the cutscenes are awful, not to mention it has a lot of inconsistencies with the Zelda universe. There are NO redeeming or even competent features for this game, the only reason it doesn’t get a zero, is because, even though some things are broken, it functions.
Insert phrase of comedic value here.