With the Christmas season pretty much here, so is the Star Wars one; and the Christmas day equivalent of the Star Wars season this year is the release of Episode VII: the Force Awakens. Now, as you might already know, I’m a huge fan of the sci-fi, laser and lightsaber filled amazing cheese-fest that is the Star Wars series. I love all the wider stories and all the force-y stuff – and Mark Hamill – and the original trilogy houses a few of my favourite films ever. I even find myself watching the prequel trilogy quite a lot, persevering because of my insatiable love for the galaxy far, far away; and I loved The Clone Wars (2008-2014) to bits, namely the 4th and 5th seasons, or, in particular, the last few episodes, which were incredible. Furthermore, I loved Star Wars Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast, if only for its multiplayer modes, and I can’t wait to get my hands on the new Star Wars Battlefront.

The hammy acting, the wider story, the range of characters, settings, epic lightsaber battles, crazy, awesome space fights, all the sci-fi stuff and the brilliant and iconic soundtrack all make Star Wars one of my favourite things; with the original trilogy and The Clone Wars especially emphasising that. However, with the prequel trilogy, came a realization that maybe Star Wars isn’t all that perfect, even though it led to The Clone Wars’ creation. I mean, The Phantom Menace is the ultimate bore-fest, with some of the worst acting around, a terrible, annoying collection of characters including the infamous Jar Jar Binks and young “Ani”, and a frustratingly disappointing villain in Darth Maul. Then, there was Attack of the Clones, which saw a small improvement, an improved villain and some more action, with a more interesting story; though the same basic flaws were apparent, and there was one of the worst scenes in history;

It’s coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere… What, sand? I thought you meant your terrible acting.

Nonetheless, the trilogy continued, and it ended. It did this with Revenge of the Sith, which, although it had most of the basic flaws left on show, and continued bad acting, it showed the potential, at least partially, that the trilogy had on offer. It was a good film, and one I watch fairly often, which has a good, or better, plot – though quite predictable and with, still, some poor writing;

Those poor, poor younglings.

But, yeah, I like it, anyway. General Grievous is awesome, and the first 40 minutes of the film are very good, to my untrained eye; and the rest of the film is pretty cool, and dramatic with the fantastic lightsaber fights. However, General Grievous isn’t made use of properly, as he dies too early, and Anakin Skywalker is still acted by the same damn guy, and General Palpatine royally sucks. Also, there’s so much stupid lines in the film – see above – and there is a lot of wasted potential, still. It seems Lucasarts realised what they were doing was crap a little too late, and still couldn’t completely remedy it with the pretty good, but still disappointing Episode III.

What I am really hoping, is that they don’t do the same with the upcoming sequel trilogy. Well, there are a lot of good signs they won’t, at least, with the choice of directors being good, because none of them are… Eurghghgghg……. George Lucas… Wait, what? Oh yeah! And one of them is J.J Abrams, who seems a fantastic director – at least based on Super 8 – and a good fit for Star Wars. Furthermore, the trailers, especially the first full one, are truly fantastic, and make me squeem. But, wait? Isn’t that what people thought of the trailers of The Phantom Menace? Darth Maul hype? Kylo Ren hype? I think so.

Yeah, he looks cool. Just as cool as DARTH MAUL.

Consequently, it’s not concrete yet whether it’ll be The Crap Awakens or not, but I’m hoping, really hoping, that it won’t be. A return to the awesomeness would be great, and I’m afraid if it’s not there may be a lot of ruined Christmases, and a collapse in faith of the once beloved series.

Whatever happens, though, I’m happy Disney have bought out the series if it means there’ll be more Star Wars on the big screen; and I can’t wait for The Force Awakens, whether it ruins Christmas or not.

– Speedy.

One thought on “Star Wars: the Crap Awakens?

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