Howdy, this is Reuben. You know, the one who’s better than Milo. I remember Zoolander. I’m sure a lot of other people do as well. It was alright. Stupid comedy, with Ben Stiller, Will Ferrell, and the rest. Not a special film. They enjoyed making it though, so they decided to make a sequel. I watched it. I realised soon after sitting in my comfy cinema seat, scoffing chocolate down my throat, opening wrappers, etc, – there were only about 4 others in the cinema, so it was okay – that it’s crap.

Well, not until the initial intro ended, anyway. Not the immediate intro, though, with Justin Beiber being shot and all that, but the bit after, which reacquainted me with ol’ Derek Zoolander and his shenanigans. Spanning through the years since 2001 via news readings worked, as the countless stupid things between the films were described in the most stupid way possible. There were good jokes in this bit, ranging from Zoolander’s bad parenting to his bad building, and it was funny. A good intro, definitely. However, most everything after it sucked.

Other than the occasional chuckle worthy gag, the only thing that properly made me laugh after the intro was Benedict Cumberbatch’s ridiculous cameo as the transgender morph “All”. Nonetheless, his was the only worth while cameo as other random celebrities added nothing to the film, and in a lot of cases made it more irritating than it needed to be. The extended cast also weren’t fantastic. The modern fashion dork with a hat, you know, what’s his face with dreadlock things, is a master in the art of douche baggery, and his jokes grew old very, very quickly. There was also Derek Jr, who also wasn’t likable, to say the least.

Get out.

Along with them, the fashion goddess Alexanya Atoz had a few rubbish jokes to begin with, whilst Valentina was just, Penelopé Cruz, being her, under a different name. What was odd with this was that it made the film oddly a little like Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, especially with the inclusion of the fountain of youth as a major plot point. Maybe it’s because they couldn’t think of anything themselves, as writers.

The plot works, I guess, and it gets Zoolander and Hansel back on the fashion scene. However, it’s filled with references and such, and it just isn’t funny. They also clearly went for the deliberately bad, but therefore good method. It didn’t work. It was just bad. Most of the writing in the film seems either tacked on or tired, as well; as a lot of the jokes weren’t funny to start with, but whichever ones were, they overused. There also needs to be something more to Hansel and Zoolander than just orgies and pouting, because they get old pretty quickly. A lot of the jokes in the film were also stolen from the first film, and the first film wasn’t that amazing anyway. As the film wore on the film got worse and worse, really – to the point where I almost thought of laughing because I felt sorry for the film. Derek Jr got more and more prominent and the plot got more and more like it was trying to be ridiculous. But they failed, because the plot points had no solid jokes to help them, and the irritating celebrity cameos were filling the run time.

Leave.

Notwithstanding, after Mugatu was finally introduced, the film was helped a little by Will Ferrell’s mental humour. He was introduced decently as well, and with him came, finally, some funny stuff. It was very short lived though, and it’s frustrating that he couldn’t have been in it more. Nevertheless, even his jokes were starting to get worn down. His possible run time was unfortunately taken by rubbish extras, and Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson, who really weren’t at their best.

Verdict:

Zoolander 2 suffers from a certain thing called sequel syndrome. A lot of the jokes in it were stolen from the first one, overused and made redundant. Any original jokes they did have for the most part weren’t very funny to start with, and got less and less bearable as the film went on. This was partly thanks to the actors performing the jokes, though, as none of the new characters were likable. Even Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson didn’t look like they were enjoying the film-making process, as they and Will Ferrell weren’t at their best. Even though the film started fairly strongly, the bad jokes and in-originality along with the bombardment of pointless celebrity cameos and unsure actors meant the rest of the film didn’t fair well, to say the least.

It’s a comedy film, so people are supposed to laugh. I didn’t hear much laughing.

______________________________________________

35/100

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– Reuben.

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5 thoughts on “Zoolander 2 (2016) Review

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